The Internet will make you miserable

A study carried out at Leeds University has found strong links between the amount of time people spend on line and the state of their mental health.

According to the report, the more time you spend sat on your own in a darkened room wandering aimlessly around the world wide wibble, the more likely you are to be a miserable sod with no mates. Geez... these people get paid for coming up with this stuff?

The study, which was based on an online questionnaire completed by 1,319 people aged from 16 to 51 found that a small group of the worst affected respondents were not only utterly addicted to the Internet, they were also really unhappy about it.

What the scientists didn't take into account is the fact that, anyone prepared to spend their time filling in online questionnaires probably needs a check-up from the neck up anyway. And we didn't need a doctorate in psychology to know that.

The study didn't say anything about people who have to spend hours on end trawling the Internet for a living, which has made me all depressed. I'm going off now for a little lie down and a bit of a cry.