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Record arms seizure at Twitter joke trial airport

Security services have announced they have seized record quantities of arms at the UK’s Robin Hood airport, the destination at the centre of the controversial Twitter joke trial.

To the sceptical among you, it might sound like a bizarre – and, frankly, tastelessly timed – attempt at justifying the verdict delivered last week in the appeal of Paul Chambers, author of an alleged ‘bomb threat’ on Twitter. And you'd have a point.

The UK Border Agency today announced that this summer, security staff had seized more than 100 illegal arms from passengers arriving at the airport from destinations including Bourgas in Bulgaria and the Czech capital Prague. Weapons seized include CS gas, stun guns and machetes.

The haul represents the greatest quantity of arms seized by authorities at the airport since it opened to commercial passengers.

“In one seizure alone,” reads the positively frothing press release, “a mother and her 20-year old son tried to smuggle in 14 weapons as they returned home from a European holiday in July.

“Officers found three canisters of CS gas, two knuckle dusters, one baton, and two finger-knives in the mother's luggage.

“Inside her son's bag they found a back knife, two knuckle dusters, two batons, and a finger knife.”

Now that’s what we call “menace”.

In case you were wondering, both pleaded guilty and received four-month suspended sentences on 1st November, in the same Doncaster magistrates’ court that last week upheld Paul Chambers’ £1,000 fine for a joke on Twitter.