Avon ends 125 years of doorstep trudging

Nursing its bunions after 125 years of trudging from door to door clutching soggy catalogues and smelly stuff only your nan's nose could bear for more than a few seconds, Avon looks like it has made its final ding-dong.

The world's most respected pyramid selling scheme, which has been touting cut-price cosmetics to the indolent and housebound for a century and a quarter, has finally hung up its sensible shoes and cagoule, and moved online.

Avon, which claims to be the leading direct seller of beauty products in the world, operates in more than 100 countries and boasts a rather healthy $10 billion in annual revenue, has launched a new 'social media' platform named Avon Connects.

The company has been online since 1997 but the new service will take the UK's local reps off of the streets and onto the Interwebs.

"In today’s time pressured-world, people want quick and easy ways to buy and Avon Connects makes this possible," said the company's automated quote-generating automaton. "By using a social media platform to link customers with their local Representative, we can provide both with a time efficient option without sacrificing the personal service that the consumers desire."

Progress is a wonderful thing most of the time, but I can remember my mum sitting down for a regular chat and a nice cup of tea with the Avon Lady, who must have had a bladder the size of a beach ball by the time she had completed her rounds, back in the seventies.

Avon said: "The online community allows customers to virtually ‘attach’ to an Avon Representative online, putting the direct seller firmly at the forefront of technology. Consumers will still benefit from traditional face-to-face service and Representatives will continue to receive trade discount– all just without the initial door-to-door process."