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Google beefing up patent department

In a world where it seems increasingly that nobody actually creates anything any more, because everything has already been patented, Google is beefing up its legal department with a raft of new hires.

The Mountain View search outfit, which appears to have a severe case of patent envy because of the diminutive size of its own underwhelming portfolio, is currently looking ot hire a patent agent, a patent counsel, a patent docketing clerk (can anyone else see a pattern emerging here?) a patent litigation counsel, a patent para-legal and finally a strategic patent licensing and acquisitions Manager.

It might have something to do with the fact that the older boys have ganged up together to pick on poor little Google, what with Apple, Microsoft, Nokia and RIM having pooled their pocket money and snapped up a goldmine of patents previously owned by Canadian company Nortel.

Or it might just be that Google has realised it can't take over the world while there are so many trolls under the bridges it needs to cross to achieve global domination.

With companies like Lodsys insisting that they own patents on selling one app from within another and sending out letters to developers in an attempt to squeeze cash out what any sane person can see is an unenforceable legal point, we just don't know what the world is coming to.

We're thinking on applying for a patent on the process of expanding and contracting the muscles in the chest cavity in order to induct and expel a mixture of common gases into the lungs facilitating what we will call 'breathing™©®'

Then you'll all have to cough up.